I gave birth five months ago and still have very little interest in sex. More so when something gets close to my vagina I shudder. Everything should be very delicate and slowly – even then very little penetration maybe My husband is a great lover and ok if i push him away (which happens a lot). I didn’t think my birth was particularly traumatic, but maybe it was IVF and then suction cuppincers, an episiotomy, was it all too much? I’m still breastfeeding and co-sleeping, so maybe that has something to do with it? Earlierwe had a great sex life; we are each listened to another wanted, and it was very nice. But after giving birth, it took me a long time let my husband even touch i He fondled me once at 5am and my initial reaction was horrified by it. He understands, and when I tell him it didn’t bring me any pleasure, he thinks about it. A friend of mine told me that I should “get back into it” because that’s how the sex life of a marriage disappears. Half of me cares I may never be interested in intimacy again. The knows the other half my husband and I will be fine: we love each other and are a wonderful couple. Will my interest in sex return organically or do I need to work on it?

Be kind to yourself. It will take some time to experience sexual desire and satisfaction – and that’s completely normal. Eventually your hormones will get back on track, your body will heal, and then the natural process of feeling like your old sexual self will begin. It would be a mistake to listen to your friend and try to force yourself through everything. This course of action can be physically and emotionally damaging. Never ignore your feelings and have sex despite the pain or lack of interest – this can cause more pain and even lead to sexual dysfunction. Either way, it sounds like your husband is caring and sympathetic to your needs during this natural adjustment period. Listen to the part of you that believes he will be fine. You deserve patience and understanding during this recovery period, your husband deserves praise for his support…and your baby deserves your undivided attention.

  • If you need Pamela’s advice on sex, send us a brief description of your problems at private.lives@theguardian.com (please do not send attachments). Each week, Pamela chooses one problem to answer, which will be published online. She regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence. The materials are subject to our conditions.

Source link

Previous articleWhitesnake cancel farewell tour of Europe, including concert in Romania – The Romania Journal
Next articleKMTrust Group – Marco Polo CE – The Romania Journal strategic alliance